You’ve Come a Long Way, Baby
Well, we doctors all would agree that smoking is bad for one’s health, but it is certainly legal. What makes this story so interesting?
Both critics and supporters of facial transplant surgery agree that cigarette smoking can significantly impair tissue healing through a variety of mechanisms.
Uh, oh - I can see where we’re going here…
“The main problems with chronic smoking during wound healing are an increased rate of infection and increased rate of flap failure,” said Victor Neel, M.D., Ph.D., director of dermatologic surgery at Massachusetts General Hospital.
No, don’t tell me this patient is willing to put her love of cigarettes ahead of her health! Surely she understands that smoking could be disastrous to her facial transplant.
“A face transplant is the ultimate high-risk procedure. Light-to-heavy smokers have something like a six- to tenfold increased risk of the skin flap dying,” Dr. Neel said.
“Six- to tenfold risk? Oh, is that all? Why, that’s nothing, Doc - I won’t even break a sweat until you tell me there’s a 75% chance my new face will fall off! In fact the gang down at the corner bar-salon is so happy to see me they’ve been buying packs of cigarettes for me to enjoy.”
Dermatologists have a term for the effects of tobacco on skin: “smoker’s face,” defined as premature deep wrinkling and discoloration of facial skin.
Why, that’s an insult! How dare they engage in such cruel name-calling! It wouldn’t surprise me a bit if the People for the Sensitive, Easily Hurt Victims of Being Alive filed a class-action lawsuit against every physician in America for such abusive language!
I’m not as quick as I used to be, but it seems to me that a patient receiving a face transplant who willingly endangers her skin graft is like a lottery winner who, flush with cash, can finally begin to make arrangements to receive all that money Dr. Olu Oboba, the Nigerian Minister of Natural Resources has been begging to send him.
This story’s been circulating for a few days now, with no reports of any response from the patient. No denials, no apologies, no promises to stop smoking, just silence.
What will she do if her transplant fails? Paste tobacco leaves over her exposed flesh to replace it?
Comment by jerseycityjoan — January 22, 2006 @ 12:37 pm
Maybe her own dog attacked her in the first place because she smoked too much. It was a misunderstood ploy to save his mistress’s life.
Dog will save us all.
Either that or he realized that she’s too stupid to live.
Comment by Dangermouth — January 22, 2006 @ 6:54 pm
Why are you surprised that some people do idiotic things to themselves? I’ve seen patients standing outside a hospital with an oxygen bottle at their side, smoking a cigarette. Seemed counter-productive to me.
Comment by Bruce Small — January 22, 2006 @ 7:27 pm
I think it’s curious her tobacco use doesn’t seem to have been addressed before the surgery. If I were a surgeon doing this kind of delicate, high-risk, controversial procedure on someone, I would want to make darn sure the patient is a good candidate for it, and that includes screening for tobacco use and/or the commitment to quit.
Stupid and idiotic? Well… badly addicted is probably more like it.
Mais c’est la vie. Q’est-ce qu’on va faire?
Comment by Kitty City — January 23, 2006 @ 3:09 am
Mon dieu! I never learned how to speak French! Did you just ask me if my toupee had slipped down the front of my forehead?
Comment by The Cheerful You-Know-Who — January 23, 2006 @ 5:52 am
In answer to your CT trans question: The Canterbury Tales in Modern Verse, Trans. Joseph Glaser.
Second place: Penguin Classics Canterbury Tales - Trans. Nevill Coghill
Bonus selections: On CD: The Canterbury Tales read in Modern English.
Enjoy!
Comment by Bardiac — January 23, 2006 @ 8:13 pm
The plot thickens: According to American Medical News, the patient was paid $175,000 to have the procedure filmed for a documentary. Some concerns are being raised that the money may have played an undue role in the decision to go ahead with the surgery, and that the French surgery team was too hasty in approving it.
Quelle surprise, alors! There’s an aroma here and it’s not Chanel.
Comment by Kitty City — January 23, 2006 @ 9:01 pm
You have to wonder is the addiction THAT strong? I mean common’on, this women just endured a LOT of pain to get a new face. And to risk way more pain down the road - perhaps she isn’t mentally stable?? Her choices don’t seem rational.
Comment by Eyes for Lies — January 24, 2006 @ 6:19 pm
Jesus…the woman had her face bitten off by a dog..leave her the f. alone.
Comment by Frank Drackman — February 11, 2006 @ 5:31 pm